No Sick Days
Something that is never really talked about is the simple fact that mamas don’t get sick days. Meals need to be made, boo-boos need to be kissed, and spouses/partners head off to work. The good old days of calling in sick doesn’t exist in motherhood. This vocation is a 24/7 gig with no OT or mental health days. So how do we nurture ourselves while nurturing our families?
One would think the most obvious time we could ask for help is when we are sick, but do we? How many of us try to power through it when all we want to do is curl up in a bed, take a nap, watch our shows, and/or read a book. And how often do we secretly hope that our partner would just take over everything even for a day so we could simply r-e-s-t.
A couple of months ago in early July we all caught that bug that was going around. It was a bit shocking and stressful considering we hadn’t had a cold or flu since February of 2020. It started with our oldest daughter, traveled to our twins, then hit my husband hard on a Saturday. Everyone lounged around the house watching movies and resting. I was so grateful that I hadn’t caught it yet. And then it happened...chills, nasal drip, insane congestion, and more COVID tests. I was exhausted after taking care of everyone for the last two weeks. This got me thinking...how can I do this differently next time.
If I am being totally honest, my diet isn’t as clean as I know my body likes. I usually stay up until 10:30pm when I am tired around 9:00pm. I rarely sit down to rest when my girls are on screen time. I feel guilty when our meals aren’t home-cooked. I am much more at peace when I meditate but rarely use my Headspace app. I have sent an intention to wake up before everyone to drink my cup of coffee in peace while I journal, but have only done it twice. I continuously put myself last. Up until a year or so ago I wore this selflessness as a badge of honor.
The varying stages of motherhood present different opportunities and challenges for how to put our mental, physical, spiritual, social, and emotional health first. It isn’t easy, but it is necessary. There is a reason everyone is telling you to nap when your newborn is napping. I never listened and truly wish I would have. I pledge to use the time when our daughters are in Kindergarten and Preschool this fall to get to know and love the new me. Permission to figure out what I really want to be when I grow up. And hopefully, the ability to take a nap when I get the inevitable cold. A happy and healthy mama makes a happy home. You were worthy before you became a mama and you especially are now. It’s time to believe it.
You can also find this article on Southern Marin Mothers Club.